lavender and gray

"

One of the most dangerous things about forgiveness is that it undercuts your ability to let go of your pent-up emotions. How can you acknowledge your anger against a parent whom you’ve already forgiven? Responsibility can go only one of two places: outward, onto the people who have hurt you, or inward, into yourself. Someone’s got to be responsible. So you may forgive your parents but end up hating yourself all the more in the exchange.

I also noticed that many clients rushed to forgiveness to avoid much of the painful work of therapy. They believed that by forgiving they could find a shortcut to feeling better. A handful of them “forgave,” left therapy, and wound up sinking even deeper into depression or anxiety.

Several of these clients clung to their fantasies: “All I have to do is forgive and I will be healed. I will have wonderful mental health, everybody is going to love everybody, we’ll hug a lot, and we’ll finally be happy.” Clients all too often discovered that the empty promise of forgiveness had merely set them up for bitter disappointment. Some of them experienced a rush of well-being, but it didn’t last because nothing had really changed in the way they felt or in their family interactions.

"
-Susan Forward, Toxic Parents, ch 9 (via fromonesurvivortoanother)
"If the goal is authenticity and they don’t like me, I’m okay. If the goal is being liked and they don’t like me, I’m in trouble. I get going by making authenticity the priority."
"At the very same time that America refused to give the Negro any land, through an act of Congress our government was giving away millions of acres of land in the West & Midwest. Which meant that it was willing to undergird its White Peasants from Europe with an Economic floor but not only did they give the land. They built land grant Colleges with government money to teach them how to farm. Not only that, they provided county agents to further their expertise in farming. Not only that, they provided low interest rates in order that they can mechanize their farms. Not only that, today many of these people are receiving millions of dollars in federal subsidies not to farm and they are the very people telling the Black man he ought to lift himself up by his own bootstraps. Now this is what we’re faced with and this is the reality. Now when we come to Washington this is the campaign. We are coming to get our check."
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Martin Luther King, Jr. (via 4eyedblackgirl)

Great quote. White people are always trying to claim that if anyone “works hard,” they, too, can become rich and successful. And they always try to cite their grandparents/ great grandparents/forefathers as “immigrants” who came to USA from Europe without much money and they became “rich.”

We all know that being WHITE, in fact, helped them become rich and successful.

(via badass-bharat-deafmuslim-artista)

(Source: )

policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.
Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.
Read more | Follow policymic
Zoom Info
policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.
Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.
Read more | Follow policymic
Zoom Info
policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.
Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.
Read more | Follow policymic
Zoom Info
policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.
Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.
Read more | Follow policymic
Zoom Info
policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.
Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.
Read more | Follow policymic
Zoom Info
policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.
Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.
Read more | Follow policymic
Zoom Info
policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.
Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.
Read more | Follow policymic
Zoom Info
policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.
Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.
Read more | Follow policymic
Zoom Info

policymic:

7 lies we have to stop telling about African-American female students

There is a myth that African-American girls generally fare better than African-American boys — that they somehow have it easier. This creates a potentially damaging narrative that may ultimately prevent society from truly empowering these young women.

Here are seven myths that we need to stop repeating when it comes to African-American women and the achievement gap.

Read moreFollow policymic

childhoodsurvivors:

In times of darkness and doubt, when it seems as if there will be no end to the pain. The memories. The dissociation. The everything. Just tell yourself one more day. Then make it to the next. Repeat that mantra to yourself everyday if you have to. Because someday, you might be able to live without the fear, without the nightmares, and live without needing to tell yourself to go on. Because you are strong and brave. You are a survivor. 

designmeetstyle:

Mirror Mirror on the Wall. Use an oversize mirror in a small room to make the space appear larger. Not only does the mirror expand the look of this living room, but it also provides for a last minute mirror check before walking out the door.

designmeetstyle:

Mirror Mirror on the Wall. Use an oversize mirror in a small room to make the space appear larger. Not only does the mirror expand the look of this living room, but it also provides for a last minute mirror check before walking out the door.

(Source: mywilddream.com)